Diary #3: Inspiring Lyrics
Hi, this message is for Benjamin Goldberg
Just reaching out to confirm your appointment
For Tuesday, September 17th, 3:20
Uh, I used to starve myself trying to lose weight
Couldn’t even get hard, my body’s so out of shape
My girl blamed herself because we stopped having sex
She started hating her own body, and now she’s doing the same
I knew it to be true, but I didn’t want to take the blame
So I didn’t bring it up when she skipped the meals I made
She ended up in the hospital tryna undo the damage
I worried ’bout her disorder like I ain’t inspired that trait
I’m so inspiring
Yeah
Fans know I’m so inspiring
Yeah
Everyone tell me I’m inspiring
I grew up middle class, but my day one was out the streets
Now you ask that kid how he traveled the world, he’ll tell you, T
The big difference between us, I had a love of family
His family was fucked up to a degree
So he relied on relationships to get the love that I got from my mom each week
I had a girlfriend but I didn’t need it like he did
So I would lie to my girl while out on tour and he would peep it
Keep it secret, inspire my bro to be okay with cheating
I’m so inspiring
Four years deep in relationship
He flew a groupie out with the merch money that I paid him with
I thought that shit was whack but we just joked about the craziness
‘Cause who am I to say no to it when I inspired the bulk of it
I’m so in-between being a kid and being on grown-up shit
That I make all my youngest friends upset they don’t got money yet
But I know all my older homies watch how free my tour life goes
They got him taking trips and forgetting they got a kid at home
Inspiring
Yeah
Fans know I’m so inspiring
Yeah
Everyone tell me I’m inspiring
I used to show up to the studio drunk with the shorty
Bumping into this kid who had his session there before me
His music sounds like mine, it was obvious who he watched
I’ve never said that he drove drunk but he saw my car in the lot
His music wasn’t great but I knew that he had potential
When he stopped tryna be me and said some shit more sentimental
This year I stopped bumping into him, asked my engineer why
He told me about a hit-and-run and DUI
My god, I’m so inspiring
I might be the reason a couple kids continue to ground with goals to reach
But how many gon’ end up like me?
Some got a passion but I think most just got obsession
And they’re lowkey chasing hype that disguise itself as a dream
Nevertheless, they’re grinding like a grown man off a pay cut
Sometimes I wonder how many years of youth I took away from
And how many kids are not gonna make it, not find a girl
Not have a kid, just chasing music ’til they fail and feel it’s bullshit
What if I told you trying to win the world end up a whirlwind?
What if I told you I’m in the same hospital I pulled my girl in?
What if I told you I know I’m inspiring and I always did?
But all in all, who knows if I’ve inspired something positive?
