If Hell Were A Bar Lyrics by Robyn Ottolini
I thought if hell were a bar
Bartender wouldn’t know my first name
Probably mix me up some watered down drink
Cut me off before I even caught a buzz
Say I’m done
I thought if hell were a bar
Jukebox would play every song that I hate
Ten dollars wouldn’t even get me George Strait
And last call would be half past eight
Oh, but wait
If hell were a bar, it’d be you walking in
Introducing me to her like we’re just old friends
Telling me how you met saying she was heaven sent
Then you having the nerve to ask me how I’ve been
My smile would be fake and you’d chalk it up to fate
I’d say it’s getting late but order one more anyway
It’d look a lot like exactly where we are
Her hangin’ off your arm
This is it, boy, if hell were a bar
If hell were a bar
If hell were a bar
I’d be standin’ in this bathroom lightin’
While that couples taking their sweet time in
That stall that I wish I could hide in or cry in
If hell were a bar, it’d be you walking in
Introducing me to her like we’re just old friends
Telling me how you met saying she was heaven sent
Then you having the nerve to ask me how I’ve been
My smile would be fake and you’d chalk it up to fate
I’d say it’s getting late but order one more anyway
It’d look a lot like exactly where we are
Her hangin’ off your arm
This is it, boy, if hell were a bar
If hell were a bar
I’d be sending up a prayer to the man upstairs
Or anyone who’d listen, anyone who’d care
Begging them to get me the (hell) out of there
If hell were a bar, it’d be you walking in
Introducing me to her like we’re just old friends
Telling me how you met saying she was heaven sent
Then you having the nerve to ask me how I’ve been
My smile would be fake and you’d chalk it up to fate
I’d say it’s getting late but order one more anyway
It’d look a lot like exactly where we are
Her hangin’ off your arm
This is it, if hell were a bar
If hell were a bar