why do i feel better when i hurt you? Lyrics by Lola Young
Can we just get into bed?
‘Cause it’s getting hard to hear the things that you said
Unless it’s dark, I throw words like punches at you
I like the way they almost bruise
Can we just get into bed?
There’s no other way around it
‘Cause I know when we talk about it
It’s always the worst that we could do
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Always try to put you in the worst mood
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Always try to put you in the worst mood
Why do I feel better?
Why do I? Why do I?
Let’s not pretend
We don’t find it hard just to accept
The people we are
Throw words like punches at you
Shove tables right across the room
Let’s not pretend
There’s no other way around it
‘Cause I know when we talk about it
It’s always the worst that we could do
Real love, no, we haven’t found it
Let’s not even talk about it
That’s nearly the worst that we could do
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Always try to put you in the worst mood
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Always try to put you in the worst mood
Why do I feel better?
Why do I? Why do I?
Hey, hey, yeah
Why do I feel better when I hurt you?
Always try to put you in the worst mood
Why do I feel better?
- how long will it take to walk a mile? (interlude): A raw, stream-of-consciousness gratitude list that feels like a desperate, whispered anchor against the chaos, finding solace in the mundane to keep from drowning.
- F**K EVERYONE: A nihilistic, hedonistic rampage through empty encounters, weaponizing sexuality as both a shield and a bomb in a defiant, self-destructive rejection of emotional intimacy.
- One Thing: A masterclass in carnal confidence, where desire is distilled into a singular, commanding focus that prioritizes raw physical connection over emotional entanglement.
- d£aler: A hauntingly intimate confession of addiction and escape, where the deepest goodbye is reserved not for a lover, but for the dealer who numbed the pain of letting go.
- SPIDERS: A claustrophobic ballad of codependency that equates identity with possession, where love is a parasitic exchange and intimacy feels like being consumed alive.
- Penny Out Of Nothing: A portrait of performative resilience built on lies, where the narrator conjures miracles from thin air to mask a profound internal collapse she refuses to acknowledge.
- Walk All Over You: A blistering reclaiming of power from a condescending partner, transforming accumulated resentment into a triumphant, stomping anthem of self-respect and finality.
- Post Sex Clarity: A tender, bewildered admission that post-coital clarity doesn't bring detachment, but instead reveals a stubborn, inexplicable love that defies all previous patterns.
- SAD SOB STORY! 🙂: A cathartic, sneering dismissal of a toxic ex, swapping bitterness for liberated indifference and reclaiming narrative control by refusing to engage with their "sad sob story."
- CAN WE IGNORE IT? 🙁: A desperate plea for a temporary reprieve from the suffocating weight of mental illness, seeking numbness over solutions and love that enables escape rather than healing.
- why do i feel better when i hurt you?: A chilling self-interrogation into the toxic thrill of emotional sabotage, where love manifests as a cycle of verbal violence and intimacy feels like a battlefield.
- Not Like That Anymore: A raw, progress-not-perfection anthem of recovery, finding grim triumph in small victories like declining a call, even if the broader landscape remains bleak.
- who f**king cares?: A devastatingly honest snapshot of depressive stagnation, where the hope to someday feel happy is overshadowed by the crushing weight of present apathy.
- ur an absolute c word (interlude): A fragmented, emotionally volatile outro that cycles through vulnerability, betrayal, and performative rage, ending the album on a note of beautifully unresolved chaos.